Fears of a Mother with a Special Needs Child

Yaakov, my eleven year old who has Aspergers, was invited over to a friend’s house. He has known this child for a couple of years, but today was their first play date. I was so excited for him to have yet another experience of friendship and be able to experience being at a friend’s house.

As I dropped him off for a two hour play date, I did let the boy’s father know that Yaakov is on autism spectrum. He may not talk to you, but he isn’t being disrespectful give him time and he will break through his wall.

An hour later, I received a call from the boy’s father.

“I don’t think your son is doing okay.”

My first thought is he lost it and his anger is out of control. But, no it wasn’t that, he had gotten sick and thrown up. The father reported that they were playing a driving game on Xbox, and asked if he got motion sickness. I said yes, but never from a video game. I said it could be his anxiety that caused it too.

When I arrived I found out while playing the driving game the washing machine was started and was unbalanced so it was shaking the room while Yaakov was playing the driving game. So, maybe motion sickness and over stimulation did cause his stomach to give him issues.

Later, he told me he was hungry and didn’t want to ask for anything to eat even though they offered him food. (In his mind he said it was rude) He said he was looking at the screen when everything went black, when he opened his eyes he was on the ground, and feeling sick. So, maybe it was blood sugar that caused it.

Heck, it was the first time at this friend’s and though he was excited he was also nervous, so maybe it was anxiety.

A friend, said to contact Yaakov’s doctor it sounds like a seizure. Now there is something we haven’t dealt with before, will the roller coaster ride start again?

It breaks my heart, what if the family will never have him back?

Now that he is at home he is fine. He is back to his normal everyday self, enjoying playing with his older brother and spending time with the family.

It reminds me of the time he threw up as I knocked on the door of the very first birthday party he was invited to at age four. As the door opened he threw up all over me. He was never invited back, and after that he refused to go to birthday parties for years. Now, he will go with some support, but what happens if we just started all over again?

Being a parent is hard, but being a parent of a child with special needs some times sucks.

I mean are we dealing with a typical situation that parents will never think about again or will they look at my son a little bit differently or maybe a whole lot differently and never have him come back?